Is it possible to attain a life that is truly in balance? In order to achieve balance we must identify the emotions, relationships and things that are important-what do you really value? Do you have a big dream? What are you passionate about? What are your desires? What are your goals? The answers to these questions will provide direction to what is necessary for you to pursue a life in balance. For many of us, we compromise many of the desires of our lives to provide what we believe is support for others not realizing that living a life without passion teaches our sons and daughters to do the same. Finding those things that fulfill us fuel our lives with purpose and passion. Remember, passion is more than being an expert at something. Passion sustains us and gives us the energy to continue when times seem particularly difficult. To find your passion, think about the things of your youth that captured your attention. Find those things that make time seem to evaporate. Explore new things, meet new people. Be nice to yourself and forgive yourself when you don't immediately accomplish all the things in the time you thought you should. The most important thing is to begin.

Here are a few ideas to explore as you search for balance.

(1)    Explore the possibilities. When you explore the possibilities of your life in balance, what does that look like to you? I remember watching Robert Schuller, host of a Sunday morning religious TV show "Hour of Power" many years ago and he began the service with these words "What would you do if you knew you would not fail"? I do not remember much more about that specific program but have often thought about that phrase and how important it is in searching for your balanced or ideal life. Explore the possibilities; what would you do if you knew you would be successful? Weigh less? Have a better job? Have a happier family life? Create an international trekking company?

(2)    Choose your path. To find your passion is work, it takes time and attention to the things that bring you joy, things that give you energy and enthusiasm for living. We are so busy doing we do not ask ourselves what we would like to do; we just do the things we think we have to do. Think back over your life. What made you happy? What did you enjoy and why? Don't worry that you will make the wrong decision, just choose a path and explore your thoughts and feelings along the way. If you feel you would like to try something different, do.

(3)    Start a journal. We had a saying in public health that what gets measured gets done- when you focus your attention on any subject you will begin to see threads that tie to that subject everywhere. When an idea comes to you jot it down. Having a journal has been one of the greatest joys of my life.

(4)    Begin with the end in mind. In my graduate program, one of my health professors had us do an exercise on planning our funeral and as I remember, we had to identify people who would speak at our funeral and write what they would say. Now that was a sobering exercise[....ummmm lets see Henrietta was a....]What mark have you left on the world? What marks would you like to leave, what messages would you like to remain as remnants of you?

(5)    Cultivate friendships. In our busy lives we often fail to reach out and make friends as friendships take our time and energy. But, relationships add so much to our lives. I am lucky. I have friends that I have had for decades; we have grown from young women to older adults and have shared good and bad days along the way. Cultivate friendships, expand the relationships in your life by being a mentor, create a support network, or volunteer.

(6)    Organize. Organize your life to minimize distractions and free time to pursue the things you value. Identify how your time is divided throughout the day and identify ways to spend more of your day doing the things you value.

(7)    Break up difficult task into smaller, easier to accomplish projects.

(8)    Stop procrastinating. Stop avoiding changing your life. Procrastination wastes time for you to pursue your dreams.

(9)   Learn to say NO. Stop accepting responsibilities for which you have little time or passion

(10)     Manage responsibilities as they present themselves. Discard undesirable mail as it is received, pay the bills, as they arrive.

(11)     Create routines for routine tasks. Do laundry on Thursdays; go to the market on Saturday, etc.

(12)     Get help if you need it. Pay someone to help you whether it is watching your children, cleaning out the garage, working in the yard or cleaning your office or your home.

These are just a few suggestions to help you on your way.

Holidays are exciting; mistletoe, twinkling lights, baking, visiting with friends and families. For most of us, these are the best days of the year; for others Holidays represent loss of what could have been and the excitement is lacking. This lack, or loss could be the result of the passing of a loved one or it may require the confrontation of why we are alone, how far removed we are from the person we wanted to be. We feel far removed from the images we see on television. We may feel poor, overweight, addicted, or alone.

According to the United States Food and Drug Administration, depression affects more than 17 million Americans a year and according to research from the University of Pennsylvania Health System more than more than one million suffer from Holiday depression. Unlike general depression, holiday depression is triggered by the holiday season. Holiday depression typically occurs in the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Years.

Why should the holidays be a time of depression? Often this time of year is filled with over indulgencies and unrealistic expectations. In general, we eat and drink too much, exercise too little, spend too much, and are stressed accommodating the desires and schedules of others.

How can I cope with Holiday stresses associated with Holiday Depression?

(1)   Be realistic in assessing your time and your money. Both are limited and how much you care for someone is NOT demonstrated by the amount of money you spend. Generosity is about giving and does not have a dollar value.

(2)   Instead of money, think about alternatives such as giving the gift of time. That seems a bit ironic since time is one of the things in short supply this time of year perhaps you can give the time at a later date such as a coupon for the two of you to share.

(3)   Remember our love ones by donating to a charity. Donations can be in the form of money or time or both. For example your parent or loved one may no longer be at the nursing home but be assured someone there would be delighted with your visit. Just playing a game of checkers or reading a book to someone else could make the holiday season special for both you and someone else!

(4)   Set a budget and stay within your budget. Address the problem for next year by creating a fund for use at the Holiday so you can purchase with minimum impact on your monthly budget.

(5)   Remember consume in moderation that includes alcoholic drinks, fatty foods and getting adequate sleep. Focus on healthy alternatives.

Recognizing the signs of depression

How do you know when you are just "blue" or down in the dumps or are really depressed? Everyone gets down every now and again, and that is normal. However, according to the National Institute of Mental Health there are several symptoms of depression. These include

1. Ongoing sad, anxious or empty feelings
2. Feelings of hopelessness
3. Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness
4. Feeling irritable or restless
5. Loss of interest in activities or hobbies that were once enjoyable, including sex
6. Feeling tired all the time
7. Difficulty concentrating, remembering details, or difficulty making decisions
8. Not able to go to sleep or stay asleep (insomnia); may wake in the middle of the night, or sleep all the time
9. Overeating or loss of appetite
10. Thoughts of suicide or making suicide attempts
11. Ongoing aches and pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not go away.

If you suffer from depression you may not experience all of these symptoms. If you have experienced any of these symptoms, please contact your physician today. Depression is highly treatable!

Where to get more information:

National Institutes of Health

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/topics/depression.shtml

American Psychological Association

http://www.apa.org/topics/topicdepress.html

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/suicideprevention/